We all have a very human need for love and connection. It is one of our greatest needs and motivators, and the fear of not having it, or losing it, creates great pain. Therefore, we are usually willing to do a lot of adjusting to not feel left out.
The problem is that that doesn’t really work. If you want to feel love, connection and belonging, vulnerability and authenticity is completely neccessary. If you are not being you, you won’t feel that connection because others are connecting with something that isn’t really you.
The connection you long for goes both ways. It’s not all about finding acceptance from others, you need to like and respect them too. Not just anybody can be your best friend, partner or even acquaintance. You need to know what kind of qualities you like in people, meetings and relationships, and then go out and find it! And let me tell you, your authenticity is key for that! When you know who you want to be and who you want to meet, you will simply see if there is a match when you meet a new person, rather than trying to gauge if they like you.
Instead of feeling rejected if if doesn’t work out, you’ll just see that you and them want different things, and that’s totally fine. There is a huge release and freedom in letting other people be as they are, as well as yourself.