“Most people” have nothing to do with your love life

It often hits me how unusually I think about dating and attraction. When I get a question I often flip it, because I think the opposite question is more interesting.

It’s not about finding the right person but about being the right person.

It’s not about finding out if the other person likes you, but if they are a good fit for you and if you like them.

And its not about what all men or all women want, or what works to attract everyone, it’s about what is important for you.

Because you don’t want to be with everyone (ain’t nobody got time for that, so to speak)

Therefore it’s completely irrelevant what everyone is doing. You need to find out who you are, and who you want to meet, and then go find, and attract, that.


Many I talk to are only looking to find one person to have a relationship with. Still, they find it very troubling when they feel that the majority doesn’t match what they are looking for, or doesn’t click with them.

I know it can feel discouraging, but the truth is you only need to find the right person once (at least at a time).

And here’s the really good news: you can try an infinite number of times. 

It’s not like you only have 3 chances and then you’re screwed. Nope.

You can go on a hundred bad dates, or be single for decades and then make it all work out for you beautifully.

Most people have nothing to do with your love life. You are at the core of it, and you invite whomever you like.

Do you know what you want?

Scroll to Top